Tuesday, 27 January 2009

Get in the Van.

Yo, picked up some hitch hikers yesterday.
I took them from Junction 23a all the way to Junction 21 of the M1.
They were doing it for Charity trying to get to Berlin. They'd come  from St Andrews in Scotland. Yeah the school where the princes go/went.

I said to the geeza, "you don't look like the stereotypical Hitchers."
He's like "What do you mean?"
I's like "Well you don't look like some potentially psychopathic murderer with a thick beard and a red-neck hair cut that hangs about on motorways looking for strangers to murder."
He looked at me then looked away and was silent for a bit 

Smoking and Wanking.

Remember back in the good old days of 2004 when they changed the law regarding the classification of Cannabis?
Downgrading it from Class B to C.
Well they've decided it's going back up.
B again.
Plus apparently now if you get caught with it in your possession then it's an instant £80 spot fine and potentially 5 years in jail.

My experience with weed tells me that 
if someone's got green on them, plus they've got £80 in cash. Then they're probably selling eighths. 

Also none of the information I've been reading about this says anything about how much is considered to be, "for personal use" and the decision to fine/charge you comes down to the individual officer involved. 
So basically the police can operate at their own discretion. 

Which means that all it takes is for some jumped up little oike with a can of CS gas and a chip on his shoulder to come at you on some power trip and out of nowhere your up on a 5 stretch for smoking twos on a spliff.


The other law that's changed or changing recently is about porn.
It's now illegal to own/view porn that is considered to be of a violent or aggressive nature.
To be honest if you where going to think up a statement like that then you probably haven't watched any porn since the 70's.

All porn is aggressive.

In fact I'll tell you what porn isn't aggressive.
Shit porn.

I mean where does it stop?
 What about if the dudes like "Take it you bitch" That's quite aggressive. 
Or if he's got his hand round her throat for a bit of sexy pseudo-strangling? 
Or what about just smacking the girl's ass while he rocks it from the back?
What about that eh? And again as far as I can tell this law is only about watching it. 
Actually doing it seems to still be allowed, provided everyone involved knows what's going on and safe-words have been established.

But yeah I was just a bit surprised to hear that if
If I want to smoke a little reefer while I'm watching a bit of fuck-fighting then I'm potentially looking at an 8 year bid. 
It's almost enough to make me take the satsuma out of my mouth, put the bong down and turn the web-cam off.

Saturday, 24 January 2009


Right, New year New Telly.
As we approach February and 2009 is starting to lose it's shiny edges. you're probably having a cheap weekend as you wait for the no doubt anti-climatic arrival of next weeks long awaited first pay day of the year.

Good news for staying in though.
After months of wait it's finally here.


If you haven't seen it yet then I ain't going to ruin it for yu. To be honest whatever I said probably wouldn't make any sense even after you've seen it.
In fact my mate Eddy is offering £200 to anyone who can come up with a way of ending the whole thing with out it seeming really disappointing.
See we've been trying to scrape some sense of what's-going-on since episode 1 season 1 and to be honest I do better than most at this but am still way off figuring out where it's going. 
Right I will give you this and it's not a spoiler cos it's been all over the net for months. 

Time Travel.

Yeah exciting init. 
But you probably could have guessed that by the fact that Marty McFly's one of the main ones this season. 
It's not actually Marty it's his cousin Daniel Faraday-McFly Jr. Him and Doc Desmond Brown are gunna either arrive at a reasonable conclusion to four seasons worth of unanswered questions or bring about the instantaneous end of reality. As Lost is planned to finish with season 6, that means they've only got 44 episodes to do it in. I personally believe that the last episode is going to start with Jack waking up and realising it was all a dream.
If you want to down load the first two episodes of season 5 then here yu go.

Heroes is back on Feb 2nd

Now a lot of folks that I've spoken to seem to be getting a bit frustrated with Heroes an all.
In my mind the second half of this season is set to be the most exciting yet. 
The government's after them all.
Peter's got his powers back
Silar's still reppin hard
SPOILER(apparently one of the main ones dies)
Plus due to the fact that the whole season is 23 episodes and the first 13 were fairly light on special effects I'm under the impression that the post production budget for the second half of Season3 should be pretty high. Hopefully translating into more CGI violence.

The frustrating thing for me about Heroes is that I've been banned from posting on the online forum. 
The reason for this is a 17 year old administrator called Darth Carp. 
He's a bitch.
Basically he ruined season 2 of Dextor for me by posting a spoiler in a heroes thread. I called him a dickhead in my reply to him and he deleated my post. I posted again including the signing off line 
"If you deleate this post you are a bitch."
He deleated it again so I took it upon my self to reply to every post he had on the sight with the comment "You're a bitch." By the end of the second day of this, the site administrator sent me a message saying that if I posted again he would block my i.p address from accessing the site.

If you fancy telling Darth Carp he's a bitch then his name is a link to his Forum-Profile.

Also Flight of the Conchords is back for a second series episode 2's on Sunday.
Here's a link to the first episode of the new season
and a video from the first ever episode.

Thursday, 22 January 2009

Supposed to have a gig last night..
Kat Vipers for the launch of her album.
Didn't go according to though.

I'm not completely sure what happened but I know the end result was that the drummer +drum kit was unable to get to the venue in time for the doors opening so the venue decided to pull the night. It wasn't anybody's fault but I did feel bad for Kat because I know she put a lot of work in.

I dunno if yu can see in the photos but on stage there was a full size harp, a whole load of percussion, 2 double basses, keyboards and a myriad of other instruments.

It was a sad moment when they turned the lights on and everybody realized that it wasn't going to happen.

Still it was also Kyle's Birthday and him and Jon had come down with me so we went out with a few of our London mates and hung around Brick Lane for a bit.

We met these 2. Our new mates.
These two look and speak like Guy Ritchie created them as a bit of comic relief.
I imagine that at the end of the film they'd be the ones walking off with the money after a series of amusing and almost implausible coincidences. 
Proper pair of chancers

Saturday, 17 January 2009

Plym off

Yu know the last Lord of the Rings Film?
Yu know how it feels like it's reached the end and then it goes on for about half as long again.
Well thats what it's like going to Plymouth from Leggy.

Seriously long yu get me.
and Bristol is like that fake ending 'cos it's still another 2 hours to the Moff

I've been here befor so I sort off knew what to expect.
They've done a bit of remodeling though.

Check that out for a dynamic juxtaposition of the old and new.

Anyway I was working in a school doing poetry init.

Then there was a gig in the evening organized through the same people.

Thing is I didn't realize is it'd be in the school.
Thankfully I wasn't alone in my awkwardness.
I had a friend.
If you don't know his name then check him out.
I personally believe that neither one of us is really suitable for a performance in a school.
But they give us free wine so that took the edge off. 
But it sort off fucked up the self editing 
I'm sure that I said a few things that were pretty far from suitable

I went and chilled with my old mate Lacey after drank some Red Wine then went back to my hotel

I was supposed to go home today but instead I stayed on so I could go breaking in the evening with my mates Mike and Ricky.

I'd had a little bit of time off dancing since finishing Tag last year but I've been back on it since November and I'm almost ready to start posting videos.

Anyway I managed to find something to do with the rest of my day.
I went for a photo-shoot.
Thanks to Tim Cresswell
Clash and Clash Photography for the hook up

The studio space was dope and we made this funny thing to tunnel the light.

Here's some of the pics

that's the action shot

PhotobucketBlue Steel

Thursday, 15 January 2009

Stick um up

Check out this billboard down near my house.


That's last night                                 

This is this morning.


Good init. It's nothing to do with me.
They asked me if I wanted to go help them do it but I didn't go.

Wednesday, 14 January 2009

People I want to punch

Have you seen that program on E4 called Rude-Tube. 
It used to have Alex Zane presenting it.
Well I sin it t'other day and
it's got a new presenter.

I tell yu what though I have never wanted to punch a stranger in the face as much as I want to punch this guy.

Almost as bad as him but not quite is the new host of Big Brothers Big Mouth.

You're number 2 mate.

Wednesday, 7 January 2009

New year.

So it's a new year then.
Year of the ox.

Only 3 years left till the end of the world
If I were you I'd start accruing some debt cos there's no point in saving
My plan for this year is to sort my life out a bit
I'm gunna start actually looking for work rather than just waiting for it to rock up.
I also plan to try and be a little bit more serious in my approach to a lot of things.
That's why I've not been on here for a week or so.
Because I've been being really serious about my self.

So anyone who's got a job offer can get hold of me via

Right that's bout all I wanted to say.
I've recently realised that I must have at least 8 or 9 regular readers so hello to you.
Feel free to send me topic suggestions or things to review.
I'll try and keep it interesting.